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Tyler Bales
In Life Lessons, , Open Mind

Issue 09 – The Inner Voice

“Everything can be taken from a person but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

– Viktor Frankl (Holocaust Survior)

I first read this quote in the book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” and it’s stuck with me ever since.

To be honest it’s kind of annoying. Not the quote, the fact that it won’t leave my head.

Mainly because it’s right and really drills home that you’re in control at all times. It reminds me to honest with myself when it’s easy to let the emotions take over.

You always have the ability to choose. Choose wisely.

—

The Inner Voice Explained

I’ve talked about this before but wanted to give a little more background on what’s happening and why.

Inner speech is thought to have evolved as a way for us to communicate with ourselves. It allows us to plan, reflect, and solve problems. This voice is believed to be a tool that enables the manipulation of information in working memory which is essential for a wide range of mental processes.

That’s a lot to say it allows us to talk to ourselves. It can be used as a way to plan, solve problems, reflect on our thoughts and feelings, and as a way to regulate our emotions and behaviors. Again it’s a tool for us to use.

If you were interested in where in the brain your voice is. It’s believed to be closely linked to the development of language, as it allows people to organize their thoughts and ideas into coherent sentences, much as they would when communicating with others.

There is also some evidence that inner speech is related to self-awareness, self-regulation, and self-evaluation.

In short, inner speech is thought to be an important cognitive tool that allows people to organize their thoughts and plan for the future, it’s also related to self-awareness, self-regulation, and self-evaluation.

Knowing this can hopefully make you see how important it is for that voice to be a positive one. To have a realistic view of the world and also be optimistic about what you desire.

“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.”

– Marcus Aurelius

“HEAD ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD”

If you were old enough to have seen this commercial on tv your back probably hurts and you grunt when you bend over. Congratulations we’re old. lol

You can find the commercial online but the product was designed to alleviate the headache their commercials caused. Don’t quote me on that.

Oddly enough now that I’m older I still experience “HEAD ON” only it’s from a slightly different perspective.

Whenever I’m faced with something difficult that emotion of fear starts to arrive. But since I know it’s natural and can be both helpful and harmful depending on how we deal with it, I can decide what I will do with this emotion.

Although it is tough, one of the most effective ways to manage fear is to confront it head-on. By facing our fears and working through them we can gain a sense of empowerment and control over our lives.

Lean into the hard parts of life but don’t do so blindly.

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult.”

– Seneca

Search for Meaning

In this rare clip from 1972 Viktor Frankl, legendary psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, delivers a powerful message about the human search for meaning.

Video Length: 4:21

—

Wrapping up:

  • You always have the ability to choose. Choose wisely.
  • The inner voice is a very powerful tool. Use it positively.
  • One of the most effective ways to manage fear is to confront it head-on

That’s all for now.

See you next week!

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In Discipline & Motivation, Life Lessons, , Open Mind

Issue 08 – Tripped at the starting line

Tripped at the starting line

This issue is hitting your inbox late, I’m sorry.

I’ve been traveling the past couple of days and at least in California it’s been pretty stormy with more on the way. The time I thought I would have to write this week’s issue didn’t end up happening.

That’s okay, that doesn’t mean all is lost.

It simply means an adjustment to the plan is needed. Just rolling with the punches.

—

The order matters

This time of year everyone appears to be in growth mode. Or at least that is the intention everyone seems to have when talking about how they want this year to turn out.

You start to see gyms, hiking & biking trails all getting more crowded with people. Everyone working on the goals they set this year. Staring strong and pushing hard.

Unfortunately, a large percentage of people won’t be able to sustain this effort long-term. Many will be back to where they started in 1-3 months. And I don’t say this as a dig towards them at all.

We’ve all seen it though. Hell, we’ve all experienced it or are experiencing it in one way or another now.

Why? Why does this always seem to happen?

It’s because the order of how you do things matter. You don’t put your socks on after your shoes for instance. Before you can do anything thats truly sustainable “outside” yourself you need to have a strong foundation inside yourself.

How’s that inner voice? How do you treat yourself when you make a mistake? What words do you choose to say? How about when you make a BIG mistake?

Life is constantly changing. Which means things aren’t going to go according to plan. You’re going to fail. Not all the time but quite often.

How you treat yourself when you do is the pinnacle of success. The words you choose to say to yourself matter. Choose them wisely.

If someone you loved failed or made a simple mistake would you say to them the things you tell yourself?

Courage & Reason – an antidote to fear

Courage is the ability to confront and overcome fear. Especially in the face of danger or adversity.

It is a quality that allows us to stand up for our beliefs, even when it is difficult or unpopular to do so. Courage is an essential virtue because it allows us to live a life of authenticity and integrity, rather than being swayed by external influences or the fear of others.

Reason is the ability to use logic and critical thinking to make decisions and solve problems. Reason is a key virtue because it allows us to think for ourselves and make informed decisions, versus being influenced by emotions or external influences. By using reason, we can come to understand the true nature of things and make choices that are in line with our values and goals.

Remember you’re in control of your mind. Together, courage and reason are essential qualities that help us live a life free from fear.

A detached perspective

Adopting a detached viewpoint enables you to see the world for what it is. Making it easier to respond to it wisely.

In his famous work “Meditations,” Marcus Aurelius wrote:

“Everything that happens is either endurable or not. If it’s endurable, then endure it. Stop complaining. If it’s unendurable… then stop complaining. Your destruction will mean its end as well.”

This means that a change in perspective can help us to endure hardship and suffering. To see difficult experiences as opportunities for growth and learning. A chance to lean in.

When we do this we need to consider the bigger picture. Focusing on the long-term consequences of our actions, rather than getting caught up in short-term desires or pleasures.

Start to work on cultivating a flexible, open-minded perspective. One that allows you to adapt to changing circumstances and to see the world in a clear and unbiased way.

—

Wrapping up:

  • Work on eliminating your negative inner voice
  • Choose courage & reason in the face of fear
  • See the world for what it is

 

That’s all for now.

See you next week,

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In , Open Mind

Issue 07 – Happy New Year

“Fear takes over the part of your brain protecting you and plants limiting beliefs trapping you in a growth-less cycle.”

People think there is one place in the brain dedicated to focusing. In actuality. focus is a combination of events occurring in different parents of the brain.

For instance, the prefrontal cortex, the front of the head, is where decision-making, problem-solving, and planning take place. This area works together with other brain areas including the parietal lobe and the basal ganglia, to regulate and control attention.

In addition to the prefrontal cortex, the thalamus also plays a role in focus and attention. The thalamus is a brain structure located deep within the brain that acts as a sort of “gatekeeper,” filtering out stuff we don’t care about and helping us to focus on the things that are most important.

I know, I know, “lobe”, “cortex” “thalamus” – these are some weird words to be taking in first thing in the morning.

The key takeaway here is that the brain is not one big muscle working alone for thinking. Instead, it’s made up of different parts across two sides (left & right) working together for you. Or it can run on autopilot with the one goal of keeping you, and itself “safe.” And safe doesn’t always mean comfortable.

When we start to learn and understand the brain that becomes our first step to being able to control it. What I find interesting is how fear comes into play in one of these areas involved with focus.

The prefrontal cortex is also an important part of the brain when it comes to our memories. The ability to remember something is a navigation tool built into our bodies. I can remember being in first and second grade getting rides home from my friend’s parents.

I didn’t know how to get home using the street names but I could tell you how to get home using visual markers along the way. It would go something like this,

“Go down this street and you’ll see a McDonald’s on your right. Make a right turn at the light after the McDonalds…”

All the way home.

Back to the prefrontal cortex. Unfortunately, because this part of the brain is fundamentally a survival tool it can be hijacked by fear and be used against you.

How does this happen?

By becoming a silent alarm system warning you not to try anything new simply because you might fail. Fear takes over the part of your brain protecting you and plants limiting beliefs trapping you in a growth-less cycle.

You can reverse this. You can erase these limiting beliefs. Move past memories that are keeping you from growing. It won’t be easy; you won’t be the same person when you finish. That’s the goal.

  1. Voluntarily bring your limiting beliefs or fears to the top of your mind (one at a time).
  2. It has to be voluntary. Construct a plan that will help you get through the issue or solve the problems.
  3. Act out that plan.

—

Short one this week.

End the year strong with your head up high. You made it.

Use the next few days to “take a breath” and get yourself aligned for the new year. 2023 is going to have it’s ups and downs and you’re going to be equipped to handle it all.

Happy New Year!

See you next week,

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In Life Lessons, , Open Mind

Issue 06 – Season of Change

Thank you for following The Patterns Newsletter. It means a lot to me you’re supporting my new path.

This will be the last newsletter that carries that name. The branding will change but the message will stay the same. The new direction is more in line with myself and will be of greater benefit to you as well as future subscribers.

What is it?

For a year or so I’ve had an idea of how I wanted to help people and the message I want to share. Over time this phrase developed in my head that encompassed everything I wanted to teach.

strong-not-safe

I started to see how impactful this message can be when communicated well. And that’s where this newsletter comes in.

I’ll help show how learning to be strong, not safe is the foundation for living & thriving in today’s world.

—

Happy Holidays!

Family and spending time with those you love is very important this time of year. Another important thing to do this time of year is to reflect. Remind ourselves of all the not-so-good times we’ve experienced this past year. Why?

To take time to acknowledge the fact you made it through them all and are here today. Things may not be exactly where you want them to be right now.

That’s okay.

Appreciate the effort you put into the last year. It was tough. You pushed through and are still going.

“Treat Yo Self!”

If you haven’t heard it lately, I’m proud of you for showing up every day this year. The best way you could.

And I appreciate you taking me on your journey.

Focus

In issue number 4, we talked about positive emotional attractors or “PEAs” and their effects on focus. Having a positive outlook, although at times tough, has many positive effects on focus.

Here are four quick things to keep in mind about the power positivity has this holiday season:

  1. Positive thinking reduces stress and anxiety: A positive outlook can help to reduce stress and anxiety, which can be major distractions that interfere with our ability to focus. When we’re feeling stressed or anxious, it’s harder to concentrate on a task or thought.
  2. Positive thinking increases motivation: A positive attitude can also increase our motivation and drive, which can help us to stay focused on our goals. When we believe in ourselves and are excited about what we’re working towards, it’s easier to maintain our focus.
  3. Positive thinking improves mood: A positive outlook can also improve our mood, which can make it easier to focus on the tasks at hand. When we’re feeling good, we’re more likely to be able to concentrate and stay engaged in what we’re doing.
  4. Positive thinking increases resilience: A positive attitude can also increase our resilience, or our ability to bounce back from setbacks and challenges. This can help us to stay focused and motivated even when things don’t go as planned.

Having a positive outlook on life can help us to stay focused, motivated, and engaged in the goals that are important to us.

It’s not always easy to maintain a positive attitude. There are many strategies we can use to maintain a more positive outlook.

It’s about finding ways to manage stress and negative emotions in a healthy way.

Fear

Fear can be irrational and based on our own doubts and insecurities.

In these cases, fear can hold us back and prevent us from taking risks or trying new things. It’s difficult at first but this response to the fear stimulus is manageable.

Try to recognize that these doubts and insecurities are thoughts and not reality. You are in control always.

By facing our fears and taking small consistent steps to overcome them, we gain confidence and become more resilient. We’re able to press mute on fear in most cases.

Fear can be both a positive and a negative emotion, depending on how we respond to it. There’s that control again – our ability to choose.

It’s important to recognize when fear is helpful and when it’s holding us back, and to take steps to manage it in a healthy way. It’s a tool and one you control.

We have to take the time to sit with it and learn its ways.

Perspective Shift

Building off of last week…

If everything is connected does that mean life isn’t just something that happens to us?

Life is THE opportunity to learn and grow.

Taking an active role in shaping our own lives and striving to become the best version of ourselves every day. Having this perspective helps view challenges and setbacks as opportunities for growth.

To find meaning and purpose in our experiences.

This perspective isn’t the easiest. It gets missed by some people because it requires a proactive approach to life and a willingness to take ownership of our own growth and development.

It also involves being open to new experiences and perspectives, while being willing to challenge our own assumptions and beliefs.

However, adopting this perspective is rewarding. It will help live a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

We’re all learning, we’re all growing that’s life.

Bonus Content

“The universe is in us”

—

Wrapping up,

  • We’re transitioning to Strong not Safe
  • Positive outlooks are very powerful
  • Doubts & insecurities are not reality
  • Life is the opportunity to learn & grow

That’s all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

Thanks for reading & see you next week.

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In

Issue 05 – Life in the pivots

Lately, it feels like things aren’t going according to plan.

Some aspects are lining up nicely and others aren’t playing out as I’d hoped. This isn’t new. Not for me at least. I’d argue this might be “par for the course” for me.

But something is different. I’m different.

I’m in control more. I’m taking steps to control my time and do things on my own terms.

And it’s working.

It’s not perfect, I am not a master yet. But I can see proof of it working. This has enabled me to pivot when things aren’t going according to plan a lot easier than it has been in the past.

Growth. Life in the pivots.

Makes me think I shouldn’t be planning so much in the first place.

I’ll keep you updated.

1 Focus Concept – Flow States

I am sure you’ve heard of the term “flow” or “flow state.” That’s because focus and the flow state are related.

The flow state is a mental state in which a person is fully immersed in an activity, to the point where they lose track of time and become completely absorbed in what they are doing. This state is often associated with a feeling of intense focus and concentration.

You might’ve experienced this before.

To enter a flow state, you must be fully engaged in an activity that’s challenging but not overwhelming. That’s the sweet spot where flow can begin.

This requires a high level of focus, as the person must be able to block out distractions and concentrate fully on the task at hand. The flow state is often described as a “zone” where a person is able to perform at their best, and many people find that they’re able to achieve their greatest accomplishments when they are in this state.

In general, the flow state is a desirable mental state that allows a person to perform at their best. It is often associated with feelings of joy, fulfillment, and satisfaction, and many people strive to achieve this state in their daily lives.

Who wouldn’t want to tap into that?

While it can be difficult to enter a flow state, the ability to focus is a crucial component of this state, as it allows a person to fully immerse themselves in the activity they’re engaged in.

1 Thought on Fear – The seed of growth?

Last week we touched on how fear talks. The typical phrases you’d hear when fear is around, especially around a good idea.

This week I want to touch on how even though what fear is saying to us is bad and we shouldn’t listen to it. Fear can be a positive thing to experience.

Fear can serve as a motivator.

Fear can be a powerful emotion that drives us to take action and overcome challenges. By pushing us out of our comfort zones and forcing us to confront our fears, fear can help us to grow and develop as individuals.

Don’t believe me?

Fear of failure drives us to work harder and push ourselves to achieve our goals. Fear of danger can motivate us to take steps to protect ourselves and our loved ones. And the fear of the unknown can inspire us to explore new opportunities and experiences.

That all sounds like growth to me.

Experiencing fear can also help us to develop resilience. By facing and overcoming our fears, we can build our confidence and self-esteem. Become more resilient in the face of future challenges. This is important in helping us overcome obstacles and achieve our goals.
While fear can be a difficult and uncomfortable emotion to experience. It can also have a positive impact on our lives by motivating us, pushing us to grow and helping us to develop resilience.

By facing and overcoming our fears, we can become stronger, more confident, and more capable individuals.

1 Perspective Shift – Stop & Observe

We often think of the world and the things in it as being separate and distinct from one another. But in reality, everything is interconnected and interdependent.

Actions and choices we make have an impact on the world around us. The choices and actions of others have an impact on us as well.

As we recognize this we begin to see how our actions, no matter how small, can have a ripple effect on the world around us. This helps us to think more carefully about the choices we make. To consider the potential consequences of our actions. It can also help us to appreciate the impact that others’ choices and actions have on our own lives.

When we understand that we’re all connected, it becomes easier to see others as fellow human beings, rather than as separate and distinct entities. This helps us feel more connected to others, and to be more understanding and compassionate towards them.

Isn’t that what the human experience is?

Connections with others and the world around us?

Bonus Content – FORM (11 Minutes)

I love surfing. I’ve learned a lot about myself and life while pursuing this sport. It still continues to teach me things.

When most people think of surfing they probably think of Hawaii.
Understandable. If you’re one of those people here’s a little edit some “surfer” put together that you might enjoy.

—

Wrapping up,

  • Tap into your flow state
  • Fear can help us to grow and develop as individuals
  • Stop & observe how everything is connected

That’s all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

If you want me to cover a particular topic, have any questions, or want to say hello, please reach out to me here!

Thanks for reading & see you next week.

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In

Issue 04 – First time for everything

Last week I did something I’d never done before. It wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be and once I finished I had to reevaluate what I thought was possible for me.
 
I read an entire 167-page book in one sitting. Cover to cover and not skip the introduction as I tend to do. No pictures in this book either!
 
This might not be a lot to some of you bookworms out there. My wife is one of them. She can knock out a book double that size and still have room to start another book.
 
For me, it was a pretty big accomplishment and opened me up to a potential I didn’t think I had in this area of my life. I was never the reader. I was never the “read a book in a day” guy.
 
That day I was though!
 
Now that doesn’t mean I have to keep this up moving forward. I am still reading and going at my own pace. But it’s possible. I can do it if I need to.
 
Now it’s no longer a question in my head. Now it’s no longer a “what if.”

1 Focus concept – PEA’s & NEA’s

 
Positive and negative emotional attractors are basically just that. When you feel positive emotions it tends to attract more positive emotions. The same goes for negative emotions and attracting more negative emotions.
 
It’s somewhat related to Newton’s Law of Motion which states:
An object at rest will stay at rest, and an object in motion will stay in motion…
 
I first learned this concept during my master’s program. It’s one of those concepts that once you learn about it you feel as if you’ve known it all along.
 
“Oh, I already know that! I never put words to it before.”
 
Because we’ve all experienced the times when everything seems to line up in our favor. We’re having a good time and it keeps getting better.
 
We’ve also experienced the other side. The times when we are in a funk and we know it. When we have to force ourselves to do something positive. Literally, force ourselves. Because deep down we know we can’t stay in this funk forever.
 
You may like George Clinton but even he doesn’t want this funk.
 
It may sound simple. Too simple to work. But there is science behind simply focusing on positive things begets positive things.
 
Don’t believe me? Try for yourself and see what happens!

1 Thought on Fear – How fear talks

 
“Here’s why that’s not going to work”
 
The voice we’ve all heard in our head at one point or another. It shows up right around good ideas or risks you want to take.
 
That’s how fear talks to us. Remember fear is a survival tool for humans. It’s part of our flight or fight response. In most cases, our fear triggers our fight response. Only we’re not fighting against fear.
 
No, fear is a little more tricky than that. We’re actually fighting against the thing that would destroy the fear. By doing that fear wins.
 
Fear keeps us from seeing anything new. It does this by narrowing and limiting our focus around negative outcomes. And like we learned in the focus section, that will keep the negative outcomes coming back more and more.
 
We will keep telling ourselves all the reasons why something won’t work. Sound familiar?
 
Who’s voice is that? Will you notice who’s really talking next time?
 

1 Perspective Shift – Wrong behavior or wrong beliefs?

 
Growing up there are certain things you just don’t do. Talk back to your parents, steal, etc. Certain behaviors you know not to act out.
 
Which makes it easier for us to spot the “bad people” by seeing those who act them out.
 
What’s going on is not only the behavior. You’re not bad because you do wrong things.
 
The issue lies with a wrong belief or believing something that isn’t true. The result of that belief is an incorrect behavior.
 
You may not be able to take back past actions but you can correct the beliefs that caused those actions to happen. That path will always be a better one to follow.
—

Wrapping up,

  • Positive Emotional Attractors (PEAs) are something you can influence.
  • Learn to hear when fear is talking
  • Wrong beliefs cause wrong behavior

That’s all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

If you want me to cover a particular topic, have any questions, or want to say hello, please reach out to me here!

Thanks for reading & see you next week.

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In

Issue 03 – Enjoy time spent with those you love

This week my wife and I had planned to go visit her family in Tahoe for Thanksgiving. The night before we got a call from my father-in-law letting us know that the entire family was sick. He told us it was our call but might not be the best idea for us to come.

This was a bummer.

My wife and I were looking forward to getting out of town and spending time with the family in Tahoe. At the same time, we got over being sick not too long ago and wanted no part in getting sick again.

We decided to stay. We started brainstorming ideas on what we could do now that we’d be in town for the weekend.

As luck would have it, Southern California received a nice fall swell for the entire week. We ended up spending time at the beach each morning. I was taking advantage of the fun surf. My wife was enjoying the crisp clear fall weather walking our dog across the beach.

My favorite things happening at once. Bliss.

As I type this now the weather has shifted. Clouds are coming in, and the surf is bad. I am grateful for the time we got to spend at home this Thanksgiving. Which is the point of Thanksgiving in the first place.

To enjoy time spent with those you love.

1 Focus Concept – Big ideas & aha! moments

There are some instances in life where focus is a bad thing. Not a bad thing but the wrong tool for the job.

Have you ever been doing a mundane task like taking a shower or walking the dog when a solution you’ve been struggling with comes into your mind? Or moments when the perfect response to the question you got earlier in the day pops into your head while you are watching a familiar show?

This isn’t random. There is science behind this phenomenon. I’ll share more in-depth information on what’s happening here in another post.

For now, understand that if you’ve put a lot of sustained focus on something it’s good to also take some time away from it. This space might be the shift you need to keep moving forward or get around the problem in front of you.

As I mentioned in previous issues, focus is a muscle.

Muscles need to rest to grow.

1 Thought on Fear – Ego fueled by fear

Our egos love to drive for us and fear is the energy they need to do it.

I’m mindful of my ego. I don’t focus on my ego but am more aware of when it’s slipped into the driver’s seat. Aware of the signs that show up when my ego is around. Unfortunately one of the signs is when I am feeling a little too good.

It feels good to let your ego drive for a bit. Your ego can get you results you might otherwise couldn’t. So why not let our egos control everything all the time?

I’m sure even reading this you know it sounds wrong. You might not be able to explain it but you know deep down the ego isn’t the best driver.

Are you familiar with your ego? Are you letting it drive a little too much?

Do you know how to tell?

1 Perspective Shift – Who is <insert your name here> ?

(There is no perfect answer here but I hope you get the concept of this exercise)

Try this exercise.

If someone were to ask you,

Who is <insert your name here> ? What would you say?

Write down your answer or remember it in your head.

…

Does it start with your career, your title at work? How close to the top are your accomplishments? Does your answer have anything about you in it?

It took a while for me to get here but my answer is something like this:

“Hi, I’m Tyler. I’m a kind, hard-working person who loves his wife and family. I enjoy helping people grow and coaching people and businesses to achieve their goals.”

My answer may not be perfect but it does touch on one concept here.

Make sure you are not tying your identity to things that won’t matter when you’re old.

(The ego hates this)

Bonus Content – Andrew Huberman Tips

Here is a Toolkit for Sleep designed by Andrew Huberman.

You thought you’d get another issue from me and I wouldn’t mention sleep?

HA!

—

Wrapping up,

  • Focus is a muscle & needs rest to grow
  • Ego loves fear
  • What is your identity tied to?

That’s all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

If you want me to cover a particular topic, have any questions, or want to say hello, please reach out to me here!

 

Thanks for reading & see you next week.

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In

Issue 02 – Thanksgiving Calorie Consumption

Thanksgiving is coming up this week. And this year we’ll be spending the actual day with my wife’s family. Because of that, my parents invited my wife and me over for an early Thanksgiving dinner this past weekend.

My mom still put out thanksgiving games like she would if it were the actual day and yes, I won the turkey race this year.

Thank you, thank you.

When we sat down for dinner and after we told the same stories we tend to always tell. <3 We started talking about how the body burns calories and uses energy. How that varies per person.

For instance, chess players during a tournament can burn up to 6,000 calories while sitting.

6,000 calories!!?

That’s pretty crazy to me. It shows how powerful the brain is. How efficiently it can run the body to complete the task at hand when trained enough.

…Meanwhile, my brain lost the phone in my hand the other day so I got that going for me.

1 Focus Concept – Are you on autopilot?

Like everything in life, the brain has its limits. The brain will need to rest and the body will need to consume back the calories lost.

When the brain is in this state, let’s say a “low energy” state it’ll shift into a sort of autopilot mode to recover. So awesome it knows to do this. Autopilot operates more from an emotional or feeling-based position. This requires little interaction from the brain so it can rest and recharge.

A downside of being on autopilot is that you are more capable of becoming influenced in this state. And what does the average person do when they are in a low-energy state?

Pull out their phones, turn on the tv, and go on Reddit. Basically surrounding themselves with tons of modulating forces while trying to relax.

Like walking through a field of land minds with your eyes closed. Can you make it across without setting one off? Sure. Is it likely you’re going to set one off less than 3 steps in?

..lol

So how do we fight this from happening in the first place? It goes back to what we talked about last week. Sleep. Did you try working on it? How did it go? What new things can you tweak to get even more out of your sleep?

It’s a core foundation of growth and tackling life’s challenges. I’ll always encourage you to focus on sleep and the quality you are getting.

It’s not only my opinion either. I’ve studied depression, anxiety, happiness, relationships, and even finances, all have a need for good sleep.

Don’t sleep on this fundamental foundation! …I’ll stop.

1 Thought on Fear – Fear has two sides

Building off of last week and talking about fear as a hidden feature within us. I took some time to look back on moments of fear I’d experienced recently and noticed something.

Fear has two sides. At least two sides.

What I mean by this is I noticed that some of the fear I’d experienced had some pretty great things on the “other side.” I had to use a little bit of logic and guts to get past the fear. When I did some pretty great experiences were waiting on the other side.

Can most people see the other side of fear?

Getting there is a whole different conversation.

1 Perspective Shift – Other people need your energy

The human experience is, at large, interaction with humans.

As babies, our brains are firing with new neurons looking to make connections. Over the course of your life, you will have around 100-150 genuine connections with people.

We seem to be able to gain energy from these connections. Like some exponential resource of energy with us our entire lives.

Try to make some new connections or call up an old childhood friend this week. Someone might need your energy now, so you can gain some in the future.

Bonus Content – Thought Exercise

If you feel lost or don’t feel the sense of “you” try this.

Take a few moments to get into a calm state of mind. You can close your eyes if you’d like.

Think back on your life to when you felt the most you. Aim for when you felt fulfilled and when you felt you were feeding your soul.

Even clients with the toughest pasts have found something to hold on to. It doesn’t have to be big. Sometimes we have to push past the initial “I’ve got nothing” before progress happens. A few quiet moments pass and I hear,

“I remember laying on my dog in the backyard reading in the sun.”

We use that as a foundation for a sense of self and grow upon it from there.

I do this exercise with my clients. Give it a shot sometime. A nice quiet space uninterrupted would be ideal.

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Wrapping up,

  • Notice when you’re on autopilot
  • Fear has two sides
  • Other people need your energy

That’s all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

Have a great Thanksgiving!

If you want me to cover a particular topic, have any questions, or want to say hello, please reach out to me here! I’ll be posting content there daily as well.

Thanks for reading & see you next week!

Tyler Bales

Tyler Bales
In

Issue 01 – Where you look is where you go

1 Focus Concept – “Where you look is where you go”

Developing our focus “muscle” is a very useful skill to start mastering.

Focus is valuable. Not only to ourselves but also to others. If outside energy can command your focus for periods of time, let’s say in an ad, it can be very profitable for them. But if you can learn to control and pay attention to your focus you can use that energy to grow yourself.

So how do we begin to work on focus?

Try understanding what focus is or where it starts.

“There are a lot of things that will modulate your focus but they don’t mediate your sense of focus.” – Dr. Huberman

Modulate is anything exerting a modifying or controlling influence on. In the example above, the modulating factor is how successful the ad is at grabbing our attention.

Mediating in Dr. Huberman’s quote is used in the technical way meaning “to bring about a result.”

To make this simple,

Modulate = out of our control
Mediate = within our control

We want to start with things we can control – mediate. Later we’ll dive into the nuances of the things we can’t control and how we can influence in those areas.

The biggest thing you can do to start getting in control of and maintaining your focus is to get good sleep. This will vary from person to person. Good sleep often comes down to more of the quality of sleep we are getting vs the duration of your sleep.

The other aspect we want to start being aware of is that your brains focus follows your visual focus. Better put “where you look is where your mind goes.” When your eyes and head are up looking forward it triggers the brain to become more focused and alert.

A good example would be what happens when we are reading a good book or watching our favorite movie.

Like working out a new muscle, we can’t start lifting heavy right away, we need to work up to it. For now let’s work on:

  • Getting good sleep as consistently as possible.
  • Understand the difference between modulate and mediate within the realm of focus
  • Observe where you’re looking, or where you are not, and how that impacts your thoughts or behavior.

1 Thought on fear – An untapped built-in feature?

Is fear built-in us as a way to get what we want out of life?

Think about it, how many times have you “had a bad feeling” about something and it turns out to be true? How many stories have you heard about how someone didn’t do something for “some reason” only to find out later following that “random” feeling benefited them?

Are we able to predict things before they happen?

Does it only work when it’s about something negative?

1 Perspective Shift – Simple & Easy

I’ve noticed that people often mix up the terms simple and easy. This can lead to a lot of confusion and bad expectation setting.

The concept of golf is simple – get this small ball into this larger cup. Seems easy! In actuality getting the ball in the cup is not easy whatsoever. For starters the cup is 500 yards away, there’s a bunch of water in front of the cup, and oh yeah you can’t touch the ball with your hands. Good luck!

How much of your energy is being spent looking for the easy way to do simple things? Is that helping you get to where you want to go?

Bonus Content – “Money & Fools”

This song came on while I was listening to a playlist this morning. I thought the messaging was very inline with what I want to help people with.

Give it a listen. (I have no connections to this artist or spotify)

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Wrapping up,

  • Learn the areas you can control with your focus
  • Is fear a feature built in us?
  • Things may be simple, it doesn’t mean it will be easy.

Thats all for this week. I hope some of these concepts help you.

If you want me to cover a particular topic, have any questions, or want to say hello, please reach out to me here! I’ll be posting content there daily as well.

Thanks for reading & see you next week!

Tyler Bales

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